31/12/19

Dear diary It's the last day of 2019 and I can honestly say I'm glad to see the end of it and a start to the new year. So many things have happened this year that have blown my mind in one way or another, so many things have happened and changed my life forever;... Continue Reading →

Am I a writer?

written in response to #YDWP, #FOWC, #Daily Addictions. As I write more and more I discover new things about myself, new wonders that I never realised I could achieve.I never thought of myself as a writer before but how can I not be? I write almost every day and have penned many short stories and... Continue Reading →

30/12/19

Dear diary. I feel utterly shitty at the moment. Not ill shitty, just an all round, life hating, self loathing kind of shitty feeling and I wish it would go away. I know it's all in my head, just a collection of hormones and medications swimming about to make me feel low and dejected once... Continue Reading →

28/12/19

Dear diary I wish I could sleep! I'm so sick of being up at 5am its untrue. I just wish, for once, that I could manage to roll over, give 2 fingers to the world and drift back off to a peaceful sleep. Just once! But it never happens, my body knows I take my... Continue Reading →

27/12/19

Dear diary Yesterday was great. Baby bear brought her little miss over and we all had dinner together. I had forgotten how much I miss having baby bear around; I miss her like crazy, but I dont miss the mess created by a baby in the house! Wow! lol. Todays mission is to keep the... Continue Reading →

26/12/19

Dear diary. So much for having a lie in over Christmas! I fell asleep at 7pm and woke up at 1am, now I'm wide awake! I'll never get back to sleep at this rate and I'm gunna be knackered all day. Baby bear is bringing her little miss over today for dinner and we have... Continue Reading →

24/12/19

Dear diary ITS CHRISTMAS!!!! Well in my head it is anyways. Were on the last sleep till mayhem and that's Christmas enough for me. Lol Today starts the meal prep as I have 2 joints of meat to cook and prep, stuffing to make and a duck to roast. I still have prezzies to wrap... Continue Reading →

Guidance

Written in response to #WOTD, #FOWC, #Daily Addiction. 23/12/19 Someone give me guidancefor I know not what to sayI hate these mental blockagesThey get right in my way I have so many words to writeThey're all stuck inside my headThey've been rattling around up there, since I got out of bed My brain is singing... Continue Reading →

23/12/19

Dear diary So much for my winter break lie-ins. My body clock is having none of it and I'm awake again at 5am! Only two more days till Christmas day though and being able to watch the baby bears open their gifts. I cant wait. Christmas is already shaping up to be a good one... Continue Reading →

22/12/19

Dear diary Only 3 more sleeps till Santa comes to drop the kids prezzies off!! I cant wait to see their little faces when they open their gifts. This will be the first year in a long time where were all looking forward to christmas day and I'm not gunna let anyone or anything ruin... Continue Reading →

21/12/19

Dear diary. Anyone would think I liked being awake at the crack of dawn but I can most definitely say, I do not! Its lonely and these small hours dont pass as quickly as I'd like them to. On the plus side, I do get some time to write, so I suppose it isnt all... Continue Reading →

20/12/19

Dear diary Bear is finally off work but still no rest for the wicked. Both of us were up most of the small hours worrying over a minor procedure bear has to have today. Currently he is having a lump removed from his head and I'm sat in a hospital waiting room. Worrying as ever.... Continue Reading →

The Yule Ball

Written in response to #WOTD, #YDWP, #FOWC, #Daily Addictions and #MLMM, #Tale waver. 19/12/19 Christmas used to be her favourite time of the year but as time went by Leila had grown to hate the festive period. She longed for the days gone by where the whole family would gather together to celebrate and it... Continue Reading →

19/12/19

Dear diary Woke up in the middle of a nightmare again and its left me feeling really sad and confused. I wish my dreams weren't so real, I wake up so confused and the feeling lingers for hours. I never remember my dreams, just the feelings I wake up with and today it's one of... Continue Reading →

Jack and Carrie.

written in response to # YDWP, #WOTD, #FOWC, #Daily Addictions. 18/12/19. Detective Jack Jacobs was an undercover cop, new to the role and currently shitting himself. He had been on the job a day when he was flung into his first role, a mission to infiltrate the local prostitute ring. He had been chosen specifically... Continue Reading →

18/12/19

Dear diary Just today and tomorrow left till bear finally finishes work for the christmas holidays and I cant wait for a proper lie in and some daytime adult company! The only upside to all the time I spend on my own is that I'm slowly learning new skills. This week I taught myself to... Continue Reading →

Don’t follow me.

written in response to #FOWC. 17/12/19 Don't follow me on this road I take. Walk besides me and take my hand, guide me, for I know not where I go. Don't follow me down this lonely road. Light my way and guide me when I am lost, for this will be a lot of the... Continue Reading →

Precious little thing

written in response to #YDWP. 17/12/19 Pretty as a pictureRambunctious as you likeEach and every single day, ICount my blessings rightI love my bear, my little missOf that you can be certainUntil the ending of my daysShe'll be my little urchin

17/12/19

Dear diary. My back is still super sore this morning but not as bad as yesterday, which is a blessing in itself. I cant seem to settle the pain through any of the normal methods I use tho and that in itself is worrying. I'm really hoping that it's just because the weather is cold... Continue Reading →

Longing

written in response to #WOTD, #FOWC, Daily Addictions, 16/12/19 The dark washes over me daily and I have to fight to find the light, multiple times a day.I don't always win my battles but the war is still in my favor, for now, and I soldier on, despite my many wounds.I long for a dawn... Continue Reading →

The good life!

written in response to #FPQ. 15/12/19. Over on #FPQ, today's thought provoking question is: What does living “the good life” mean to you? Do you think that you’re living “the good life”?Fandango 15/12/19 Fandango poses a great question today and it has me thinking about my life and how I really feel about it. Am... Continue Reading →

16/12/19

Dear diary Woke up in pain again. I'm sure the meds are not having the same effect they used to, either that or I've done some more damage to my back that I'm not aware of because this is far worse than the normal levels of pain I'm used to. Bear is on his final... Continue Reading →

Memories

written in response to #YDWP, #FOWC, #Daily Addictions. 15/12/19 Did you ever ride a tea tray down the stairs as a child? I did; and suitcases too. I remember my brother and I sitting our little sister on a tray and letting her go bouncing down each step, giggling her little head off as she... Continue Reading →

15/12/19

Dear diary BB2 bought her MB over a day early, so yesterday afternoon and evening was spent having multiple cuddles with my newest grand baby, and what can I say other than I'm in love with that little girl so much. Shes so adorably precious and looks exactly like her mummy. Family days are so... Continue Reading →

14/12/19

Dear diary. It's a Saturday morning and I'm up at the crack of dawn because bears at work again. By the time he has finished next thursday evening he will have worked for 11 days straight without a break and I'm really worried hes pushing himself too hard. I'm scared hes going to keel over... Continue Reading →

Choices

written in response to #WOTD, #YDWP, #FOWC, #Daily Addictions. 13/12/19. A belated attempt at writing today, my brain wont get moving and my minds gone astray.I need to oust the angst I feel as I sit here with my pen, and address the thoughts and feelings that speed in and out again.My head is full... Continue Reading →

13/12/19

Dear dairy I PASSED MY EXAM!!!! I cant believe it!! 62.5%! I guess all they prayers have paid off and I do know something about finance after all, well, the theory anyways... I still have the math component to sit in the January exam period but the score I've achieved already is enough to scrape... Continue Reading →

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