4/11/19

Dear diary

My cold rages on and shows no sign of abating anytime soon. I have a fever and chills to go along with a chest that feels like it’s full of soup and that’s making me cough till I’m sick! My bones hurt and I have the headache from hell too.

But nothing stops just because I’m ill. I still have to run around after everyone, clean and cook and go to lectures and do my homework. It doesnt stop.

Some days I wish I had never had children, especially days like today when I could happily crawl back into bed and cry myself to sleep. No kids would mean no responsibility and I could certainly do with a week of that right now.

I wouldn’t swap it though, nice as the idea of a break may be, my baby bears are the only thing that’s kept me going over the years. Without them, all of them, I wouldn’t still be alive that’s for sure. There have been so many times I’ve wanted to end it all and one or more of them have been my reason for carrying on with everything. I could never leave them.

It would be nice to have a break tho, just whilst I get over this cold.

Xxxx