Dear diary

Nightmares again! I don’t know if it’s the medication or the mental health issues that are causing it but it’s always the same theme and always wakes me anxious and afraid. It only ever happens if I manage to sleep for more than a few hours at a time and it puzzles me no end.

I know dreams can be prophetic and that their symbolism can have meaning but my dreams feel more than that. They’re so real that I wake confused and disoriented and it takes me a good while to come round after as the memories linger. I often feel like I’ve lived two lives on days like this and it leaves me drained. I wish I understood the significance of the imagery my mind keeps playing to me, maybe then I could process what is going on and I could sleep better.

Tonight were taking the kids (the bears and bears youngest) to the fair so I need to pull myself together and crack on with the day.

So much to do, so little time.


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